Once more into the breach, and one more semester until I’m free. Don’t know what I’ll do with that freedom yet, but it won’t be school. It feels weird being back, and at the same time…pleasant. I think it’s just been an unusually long summer; a lot more people have vacated the metroplex, moving forward with there lives…


…How did ^that^ ever become a meme? ::Shakes head:: The internet is a weird place.

Well, I thought that in the spirit school getting back in motion again, for a lot of us, that I’d start with a few school related topics.
At 26 years old, I feel like I’ve been in school for entirely too long, and I’ve definitely seen some weird stuff. I’d like to wonder out loud for a moment, what are some of the weirdest things that you’ve seen at school? Everyone has got to have some stories, and seeing as I should have gotten my Bachelors degree twice over at this point, I may have more than most, so I’ll go ahead and get us started with a few things.
I’ve seen a kid whip his dick out in the middle of class in middle school. All I really recall about that one is a girl walking up a row from sharpening her pencil or something, and just stopping dead and yelling out, “Oh my God!” Once I’ve looked up at her and followed her gaze, lo and behold this kid is just sitting at his desk with his dick out. He wasn’t rubbing one out or anything, it was just out there.
Now, back me up guys…I’ve forgotten to zip up my fly many times, but I’ve never breached my undies and open fly without my knowledge. I feel like you’d be fully aware if your dick popped out to say hello. You’d feel the breeze.
It may very well have been intentional, for the girl’s benefit, but he played it off like it was an honest accident…didn’t even get sent out in the hall or anything.


I’ve “caught” teachers having sex in high school. Before you go overboard here, this wasn’t a sex with students thing, it was two teachers getting it on with each other. At least I’m pretty damn sure. Let me lay it out for y’all. I was in band in high school…marching band. I played one of those instruments that had two separate marching and concert variations, and meant for a couple of big cases that had to be hauled around almost constantly.
I was up at school one weekend with a friend from my section attending an arts fair type thing. He hadn’t taken either of his instruments home on Friday as he couldn’t get a ride that day, and when we finished with the arts thing, he asked if we could swing by the band hall on our way out so he could grab his instrument and practice a little over the weekend. The end of the building that the band hall was on was technically closed off, but security was light and we had a decent excuse so we proceeded anyways. We got to the band hall and retrieved his instrument when we heard noises coming from the band hall office. We immediately crept out of eyeshot from the office windows, but didn’t bolt just yet. We wanted to find out what was going on, and as we listened it became apparent that there was some increasingly heated sexual sounding moans coming from the office. The blinds were drawn in front of the band hall, so we couldn’t see anything. We decided to press our luck and sneak back to the practice rooms behind the office where there was another set of windows looking out. Those blinds were drawn as well, but they kept getting jostled in a very rhythmic fashion. We decided at that point to bolt. We exited the building on the band hall side of the school, and saw only 2 cars sitting out in the parking lot right next to each other. Those cars were extremely easily identifiable as belonging to 2 of our band teachers…2 that had a reputation for subtly flirting with one another. There was no question in out minds…there was some sex happening that day.


We broke a teacher my freshman year in high school, and a kid lit up in class. If our teacher hadn’t come around and embraced the darkness towards the end of the semester, I might still sincerely feel bad about what we did to her. But since she came around, she actually became one of the cooler teachers I had in high school, and I think she ended up liking us as well. Let’s start at the beginning though. Never before and never since have I been in a class full of people that could have cared any less. As in, every single one of us…not a single care was given. No one wanted to be there, and it was clear within the first couple of days that our teacher was easily agitated by a…non-captive audience. About a quarter of the way through the semester we started rebelling against her, and she finally one day went back to her desk and started crying (felt like an utter D-Bag that day). From that day forward though, she didn’t care either, and we all got along much better…and all pretty much got A’s.
There was one day that we were working on these skits, and one of my friends brought in a smoke machine to do the phantom of the opera. She was taping these skits, and kept messing up with the camera, so we had to unload that smoke machine like 7 times. The classroom was completely filled with smoke. One of the stoners who was sleeping woke up and, I’m guessing he assumed he was somewhere else, just decided to light up in the middle of class.
We ended up getting the best reactions leaving class that day, opening the door and letting the smoke billow out.


I saw a girl running naked through campus. At some colleges, with certain traditions, this might not seem like that big of a deal, but this was at OU, located right smack dab in the middle of the Bible Belt. I was on my way to foam party…they’d just organized a party on a vacant level towards the top of one of the parking garages and filled it with an endless supply of soap bubbles. I was still trying to be an actively social person, so I wanted to go and check it out to see what it was all about. I’d gotten a little over half way across campus when I saw someone running from the direction of the union. As the person got closer, it became apparent that it was a girl…as naked as the day she was born…running straight at me. Now, at this point in my life, I was no stranger to pornography, but I’d never seen nudity in person…the occasional nipple slip or pantsing, sure…but not a fully nude hottie running flat out in my direction before. Not only that, she was yelling, “Come on! We’re streaking! Let’s go!” Just like you see in the movies, like Will Ferrel in Old School, but less penis and more amazing bouncing boobs. She even stopped next to me, running and bouncing in place, and tugged at my arm to get me to follow her, “Hey! We’re streaking! Come with me, let’s go!” What a wonderful opportunity that was, and anyone less socially awkward could have taken that situation and made much more awesome memories with it. Not me, I just said to her, “Uh, yea! Have fun!” She playfully shook her head and kept on running. Did I at least follow? Nah, I kept walking towards the party, where she undoubtedly originated from. Someone got lucky that night, I’m sure. But hey, I was asked by a couple of security guys a few minutes later if I’d seen a girl streaking, and I sent them off in the wrong direction to gem them off her tail. So wherever you are, foam party streaking girl from OU freshman class of Fall 2005…you’re welcome!

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I could go on for days…finding poop under a trashcan, going to lockdown when a kid brought guns and knives to school, this weird fad girls had called “tamping” or “padding” or whatever, I’ve seen a lot. Haven’t we all though? Bring me your stories…leave a few here. Maybe you can do better…maybe we went to school together and you remember some this stuff, I want to here about it.

I totally could have nailed that girl. Ha, yea, sure. I bet if it happened again today, I’d still stand there like a blithering idiot. That crap just doesn’t happen down here. People are just too…conservative down here in the south. But, I’ve found out that this isn’t necessarily the truth everywhere. There are colleges out there that have nude traditions, some even that are…gasp…clothing optional. It’s a little late to put in your transfer papers at this point, but if this sounds like a fun environment to learn in, maybe you might start getting your applications ready for a few of these schools.
Bard College – Rumor has it that the campus is clothing optional, but you might check the word on the street before you roll out to class in your birthday suit.
Bennington College – It’s a very liberal college that actually does having a “clothing optional provision” in the schools constitution. It’s not really part of the culture anymore, but no one could legally stop if you you so desired.
California Institute of the Arts – This school definitely has a clothing optional swimming pool. I’m not sure whether that means the entire campus has the same option, but with a place that believes that nudity is an artful form of self-expression, one could assume.
Hampshire College – There’s no question about this place. It is officially a clothing optional college. You are almost guaranteed to run into a few nudes in a college career there.
Ithaca College – There isn’t any official provision endorsing or banning nudity, but evidently it’s a common enough theme to see people wandering around in the buff.
Massachusetts Institute of Technology – Yes, MIT is on this list. Believe it or not, but evidently MIT has numerous clothing optional halls in one of its dorm buildings.
Reed College – It is not uncommon for there to be people to be sunbathing naked on particularly sunny days on the campus lawn. And it is rumored that there is at least one dorm, if not several, in which students frequently run around naked.
Smith College – It might be that the entire campus is clothing optional, but this place has a reputation for its parties. Supposedly its more common than not for dorm parties and apartment parties to end up completely nude by the end of the night.
UC San Diego – The school itself doesn’t have a reputation for nudity, but there is a nudist beach just on the edge of campus. So anyone looking to relax and bask about in one another’s nudity doesn’t have for to travel at all.
Wesleyan University – There is at least one confirmed clothing optional dorm on campus. That’s still enough, right?

Other schools out there may not fully embrace nudity quite as much as these places, but still periodically have there own traditions in celebration of nudity periodically.

Bryn Mawr College – It’s said that Katherine Hepburn herself would, when tired of studying in the library, take a study break by skinny dipping in a nearby fountain. Now, most students uphold her tradition by skinny dipping in the fountain before graduation.
Dartmouth College – There is the Ledyard Challenge to swim naked across the Connecticut Bridge and then run back across before toweling up. There is also the Blue Light Challenge in which streaking students try to press the alarm on each and every one of the blue light emergency phones on campus. It’s said that there’s even a Thursday night streaking club.
Lewis & Clark College – Students run a naked mile every year on prospective student week to celebrate body image. Running in your undies is fine, but full on nudity is more than appreciated at this event.
Ohio State University – On the Thursday before the big rivalry game against Michigan every year near the end of november, everyone on campus does the Naked Jump into nearby Mirror Lake. November…freezing cold lake…yea, why not.
Purchase College – Once a year, in celebration of body positivity, The Indy, a campus news magazine, will publish a Naked Issue in which students will pose nude.
Reed College – The school has a tradition where at the end of the year, there is giant party on campus where students will strip down, cover themselves in blue paint, and run around campus chasing people who aren’t naked.
Smith College – I mentioned the parties had a reputation for stripping down. Nudity is also supposedly very common around convocation. There are also a number of traditions that involve jumping into a local pond naked, and running through various buildings naked. One of those buildings is the campus library.
Tufts College – The tradition was started back in the 60’s to streak around the quad in protest of the last all-male dorm becoming co-ed. Now, the Naked Quad Run occurs every year during the first week of December.
University of Vermont – At the end of every semester, students celebrate the end of classes by holding a naked bike ride, and it’s completely legal.
University of Virginia – Streaking the main lawn on campus is a regular tradition here, as well as stopping mid-streak to kiss the butt of the Homer statue.
Wheaton College – This is a religious college in Illionois. Supposedly even there, during the first snowfall of the year, students like to celebrate Jesus…naked, but running nude around the sign that reads, “Wheaton College: For Christ and His Kingdom”. The school obviously doesn’t support this though, so students risk a $100 fine and disciplinary action from the school if they are caught.
Yale University – There is a Naked Library Walk during finals where students hand out candy in the nude…at Yale. Yea, higher education…smart boobs, giving out candy during finals!

So, who’s preparing there transfer applications yet? Ha ha, not me. I couldn’t handle all the scattered T&A around me, and I’d get excited way too easily.

Well, dang. I’m just about out of time here. One last thing before I go though, I mentioned last week that I wanted to do some kind of college football outlook thing. I’ve got a couple of schools that I’m personally keeping up with now, and also my cousin is starting as a freshman Warhawk at Louisiana-Monroe this year. As it were, they faced my Oklahoma Sooners this past weekend and absolutely had their butts handed to them. I was kind of torn there, It wasn’t pleasant seeing my cousin’s team beaten, but let’s be honest…it was intended to be a tune-up game for the Sooners anyways.
Oddly, UNT’s team absolutely destroyed their game, 40-6 against Idaho, so maybe they have a chance for this year. Maybe at a winning record, not for a top ranked spot or anything like that…let’s not get ahead of ourselves.
So what I’ve decided to do is every week I’ll put together a schedule of big games, and condense it down to 5 or so to list here, so that it doesn’t take up that much talk space. So, given my preference for Big XII, SEC, and Top 25 teams, here are my recommendations for the coming week
Saturday Sept. 7th
11:00 AM      No. 10 Florida at Miami (FL)                    ESPN
  2:30 PM      No. 3 Oregan at Virginia                         ABC/ESPN 2
  3:30 PM      No. 6 South Carolina at No. 9 Georgia      ESPN
  6:00 PM      West Virginia at No. 16 Oklahoma            FOX
  7:00 PM      No. 14 Notre Dame at No. 17 Michigan     ESPN

I’ll leave it at there for today. I’ll catch y’all on the flip side.

Keep your heads up, your minds sharp, and your hearts open.

– CVSleen

Lemon Dill Salmon with Italian Pesto Pasta

Lemon Dill Salmon with Italian Pesto Pasta

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